“Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way…..” may be a popular sound welcomed by the mechanically aided hearing of local Ryedale pensioners. But in this festive time of carolling and Brussel sprouts The Malton & Norton Rugby Ratcatchers like nothing more than the piercing call of a hunters horn and the swish of an alkathene pipe. Although Dale Winton may lick his lips at the pictures conjured up by this description, the Rugby Ratcatchers can guarantee, all followers of the sport, that rodents neither celebrate Christmas nor the birth of the Christian Church. As a result the Yuletide break is a time that suits the control of vermin.

It was from an organised gathering, that co-insided with the annual Boxing Day, Middleton Fox Hunt Meet that an impromptu event was organised. Being a supporter of the hunt the Barton farmer happened upon our Banner at the top of the market place displaying our organisation. As a field sports fan he felt that a visit from a group of terriers, to attend to a rat problem that was blighting his pheasant feeders, would be more sporting than applying their food with poison.

And so it came to pass that a convoy of cars, three terriers “Toffee”, “Coco” and “Nipper” and a group of enthused and Sloe gin fuelled stick men set out to an area of wasteland in Barton. The site had been used for a private party only two days before and so at first glance the pickings looked as though they could be slim. However ‘Everything comes to he who waits’ and as the ratting group ventured further into virgin territory the quarry made itself known.

A duck flight pond seemed a central geographical point to work from. With pheasant feeders just a few yards to the east and west of the water; rats might well have thought that their 18-30 leisure complex with restaurants and poolside residence was idyllic. Little prepared them for the disruption they were about to encounter as our local gym owner went to town gassing their rooms with the team smoker. Unlike the grief filled stories we have heard from recent hotel boiler events on a certain Greek Island the fumes did not kill the sleeping inhabitants but bolted them in the direction of excited screams, flailing alkathene pipes, stamping feet and snapping terriers. Both “Toffee” and “Nipper” dispatched with a far greater efficiency to that of the somewhat shell shocked stickmen and lady.  Allowed of her lead for the entire duration, rookie terrier “Coco” began the steep learning curve to being a gladiator by tag teaming rats with her team mates.

A number of patches of earth were cultivated with spits and flushed with the smoker to great effect. Sadly the reaction time for some of the stick men resembled that of a tortoise dodging racing cars with an unacceptable number of rats escaping their lair to the sanctuary of the hawthorn undergrowth. By far the most entertaining drive was a smoked land drain that fed the duck pond. Both “Nipper” and “Toffee” waited patiently at the mouth of the drain, executing the dazed and gasping rats as they fled the ‘Tunnel of Doom’. However with the terriers biggest quandary of having only one mouth some of the rodents escaped as the terriers shook their quarry to death. Believing they had found salvation in the deep waters of the pond five rats swam to the centre assessing a safe mooring to escape from. To their misfortune non could be found. Such a watery battle has not been witnessed since the Battle of Waterloo where Napoleon got his smelly French arse kicked. The rats tried to avoid half bricks and fence posts as they skilfully tread water. Most sought salvation, many found the edge of spade very unforgiving. There was one rodent however who in human comparisons may well have been played by Patrick Duffy as the Man from Atlantis. Comments were passed that Duncan Goodhew would have been unable to have tread water for as long. As the ratters boundary grew restless so to did the terriers. “Toffee” could hold back her frustration no longer and decided to take the plunge after the rodent. After a spell of doggy paddle “Toffee” lunged for the rodent only to be dragged under by the otter/rat. Sadly the fear of drowning overcame the small black and tan terrier and she returned to the bank side.

It was at this point that the line between ratting rights and wrongs was sadly smudged. According to the Constitutional Rules of  Ratting ‘Thou Shalt only rat with terriers, soft mouthed dogs are strictly forbidden’. One of our first team squad, keen field sport supporter and local gym owner happened to have his two Labradors out for a walk. Although they were kept away for much of the hunt “Scooby” and “Olly” were eventually used to pick up, retrieving the half drowned rodent from the freezing cold waters. Once dropped the rat felt what few remaining moments of its life it had on dry land before “Nipper” sent it to a warm and cosy sleep.